You might have been the one that initiated the split and now you are regretting it. Your partner might have initiated the split whilst you believe that the relationship has a lot of life left in it. It is a pretty bad time for both of you, but there are things that you can do to get back with your ex. No matter how bleak things look, do not forget that people get back together every day and some of them have been through worse than you have. If there is a chance that your relationship could work again then you have to try.
Be prepared for the fact that you might not get back with your ex. If that happens at least you know that you tried so you can have closure on the relationship.
There are certain types of relationships that you are probably best walking away from. If there has been emotional or physical abuse then do not ever go back to your partner, you deserve better. If you have been in this situation before and your partner is promising that they will change again, then is it worth going through all of this again? Do not stay with your partner if the only reason is because you think that you will not get anyone better, partners in a relationship have a mutual desire to stay together, anything else does not make for a healthy relationship.
Once you split, you need to keep the contact with your ex to a minimum, and you certainly do not want to get back with them straight away. At this point your mind will be a mess and there is no guarantee that you will be able to make major life decisions. Take time to sort out your emotions and your feelings on the relationship. When you are able to know what you want then start talking to your ex.
Do not ever beg, chase or stalk your ex. It demeans you and makes you look desperate, pathetic and will wreck havoc with your self esteem. If you start begging your ex for another chance then you are likely to irritate them which will do you no good at all. It is possible that your ex will take you back out of pity, thereby destroying the relationship dynamic. In a relationship you are both equals, if your ex takes you back through pity, then you are no longer equals which will probably cause problems for the relationship.
Do not fight the breakup, accept it. The more you fight it the more intransigent your ex is likely to become. Once you have accepted it then you can start working out how to get back with your ex.
For your own peace of mind you need to find out what went wrong with the relationship. You need to sit down and talk with your ex, say that you regret what has happened and then put forward your theory as to what went wrong. Your ex might have a completely different perspective, one you know where things went wrong you have a base from which to build.
Take a look at yourself. Are you the same person that you ex fell in love with. The chances are you have changed, but how far have you changed from the unique individual that your ex first fell in love with. If you have been neglecting yourself then look at ways that you can change, maybe go to the gym, a new look. Do positive things that will boost your self esteem and confidence and will probably be noticed by your ex.
You could let your ex know that you have been thinking about them. Use pleasant memories to aid you to get back with your ex. For example if you had been to a favourite place then say you had, and that you had thought of them. If you have any light hearted memories you could call, text or email and say, do you remember when… Invite them out, not on dates but just as friends, maybe you could join friends for a drink, go for a game of tennis, it does not matter what so long as it does not look as if you are trying to get them to commit.
Take it slow and easy and so long as you both still have feeling for each other then you should get back together. Build this new relationship on a foundation of friendship and mutual respect. Share each other lives and interests, do things together and enjoy each other company. Share your feelings and emotions and be each others unconditional guarantee of support. If you work at building a healthy relationship it is unlikely that you will drift apart again, and I hope that you have many happy years together.