Are you planning a wedding on June 11th? Perhaps we should examine your wedding horoscope. In order to advise you properly on your June wedding and the future of your marriage, it is mandatory that we take a proper look at the past. Since history often repeats itself, I’d advise you to think about your wedding plans as you read this historical love and marriage forecast.
According to Those Were the Days, June 11, 1793 was the day Robert Haeterick was issued the first patent for a stove. In the ancient era, a stove would have made marriage much easier for both wife and husband, no doubt. However, stoves are not as important today in a marriage, and your wedding is not in the eighteenth century. Your bubble should be popped when I inform you the first operational stove didn’t come out until the nineteenth century.
With this data in mind, your wedding horoscope predicts this historical love and marriage forecast for your marital future:
1. One partner in this marriage will become domestic after the wedding and end up slaving in the kitchen for twenty, possibly thirty years before seeing any real progress or change in the marital relationship. You may desire divorce before you get what you expected in this marriage. When you finally get the stove, it may be not be a working model, but rather an exhibit model instead. Further, if you wait twenty to thirty years to have your marital expectations met, you should go ahead and consider the stove broken and cast it beside the road.
2. If your new marital partner issues you a patent, please realize this means you have been issued a dream that may never be fulfilled. Your partner is likely a dreamer that will never get anything accomplished. If you enjoy hard work while your significant other parks a lazy assitude in front of the television, then by all means, please marry your bum. My mom would say, “You made your bed, lay in it.”
3. It appears according to your wedding horoscope that you should stop seeking marriage. If he has proposed, turn him down flat. If you have wedding plans, cancel them. You’ve probably been together a long time already. Don’t accept a patent. Get out of the kitchen. You are getting burnt by your stove.
When the smoke clears, you will curse because you know you should have listened to this wedding horoscope. Your historical love and marriage forecast has prophesied deception, poverty and a huge need for aloe.
Those Were The Days
Purely for fun, a laugh and entertainment!