I find myself amazed, just walking through the store, at the behavior of children and teens today. I often find myself thinking “my momma would have popped my tail-end for that” or “daddy would’ve snatched a knot in me for that”. Children are lacking respect and manners, parents are afraid of their children, but who is to blame? This will never be a clear answer, but maybe there is a way of helping to distinguish fault in certain cases.
Parents must understand, from the day their children are born, they are raising the “Future”. Our children will become our President, Congress, Doctors and Police. They learn by what they see us do and the things that we say. If we use the words “please” and “thank you”, even before they can speak, and then guide them to do the same, soon it will be habit. If our men open doors for our ladies, our boys will see that as ‘just how it is suppose to be”. When we hand out consequences, they should never be threats. We have to follow through, if not, what right do we have to expect to be taken seriously, to not become a “joke” in our children’s eyes? “Say what you mean and mean what you say”.
We are all guilty of working hard to “Give our children a better life than we had” and “doing the best we can do”. As parents, that is exactly what we should do, however, we must always be vigilant to not let that become our excuse for slacking. Our men should show our boys how to grow up to be great men, fathers and husbands. He should show our daughters what is and is not acceptable from a husband and the father of her children, by his actions. Women are responsible for the same, teaching our daughters and showing our sons.
In short, I am saying that in children under the age of ten-/+, excluding mental deficiency’s and medical problems, the problem is probably insufficient parenting. The child that yells at the mother in the store, does so because it has been allowed. The child that is selfish and rude, is so because it hasn’t been effectively corrected. The child that pitches fits and hits in anger, does so because that is how he/she sees others express anger or because it hasn’t been addressed properly. By the age of ten-/+, our children are already molded, they are probably already who they are going to be.
There comes a point, when our children get older, that we have to accept the fact that they now have to make their own choices and decisions. If we can look back and know that we truly did the best we could, and that we gave our children the tools they needed to be a successful adult/human, then at that point, it all falls on the kids. The teenage boy that robs the bank, does so because he chooses to. The daughter that drinks and drives does so because she chooses to. Give the best you can… ultimately, its up to them what they do with it.