As a mother of three sibling girls, I have the privilege to experience the competition and jealousy that comes along with the high maintenance of my three beautiful daughters. My two oldest daughters who are ages 13 and 10 have had the competition and jealousy between them since they were very little. They have also been an innocent victim have their parents divorce and live in two different households, which does not make things easier. When the 13-year old was younger, she would make fun of her younger sister, not let her watch her when she is having fun or working on a project and has even tripped and bumped her on purpose. It did not matter how much I tried to talk to her, she was angry about something and when my back was turned, she would do it again. I finally noticed a pattern when my 10-year-old started treating her four-year old half-sister in the same manner that the oldest sibling treated her. I realized then that setting a good example not only from a mother, but the oldest sibling can make a great impact on the respect that children will have for each other.
With three sibling girls constantly fighting, teasing, and making fun of each other and having each one of them trying to compete for attention as well as having the green-eyed look of jealousy, a mother needs to step in right away and start setting the good examples with each situation. Your daughters need you as role models and you need to teach the older ones how to set good examples for the younger ones because they will set a pattern that when they turn into mothers and have children, the same patterns may still exist.
Mothers can begin setting good examples by staying calm and using a quiet voice when it comes to their children yelling. When the children start to yell, the mother tends to yell over them and before you know it, everyone is yelling and out of control. This is a great example to for a mother to start using her softest tone no matter how much your children are yelling. This may be very difficult to do, but the more you stay calm and keep a soft voice, they will learn by your good example and maybe they can disagree with a more quiet tone.
Another good example that a mother can set with their children is to teach them to respect one another. If your children see you put down your ex-husband or any other individual or they see your ex-husband putting down you or another individual, this will teach them that people are not important and they won’t respect you. This will also cause your children to put down each other and have no respect for one another, which will cause more tension, competition and jealousy. A parent should never put down another person in front of their children, you will find that they will do the same.
Although there are many great examples a mother can set in their family, when you have three children out of control with yelling, competition, jealousy and tension between them, a mother can sit down with the oldest children and explain the pattern. Explain to them that their examples to their little sister has now passed down to the littlest sister and she is being treated in the same manner. It may be difficult for your children to break the pattern, but the more you try to work with them and talk to them about setting good examples, you may just find a change in your home of peace and tranquility and respectful children.