Knowing whether you’re feeling love or lust isn’t always easy. Usually, the initial stage of dating is a mix of lust and like with a dash of excitement. After some time passes, it may be difficult to tell whether the feelings grew into love or you just think they did. The sooner you come to a conclusion, the better it can be for you and your guy. If you identify with one or more of the following signs, your relationship may be more about lust than love.
Deep Conversation Isn’t Very Important
When you’re developing strong feelings for a guy or are already in love with him, you usually want to learn as much about him as possible including about his past and what he sees himself doing in the future. You’ll reveal deeply personal information about yourself as well. I once dated a guy who kept telling me I didn’t open up to him enough. After awhile of hearing this, I realized it shouldn’t be as difficult for me as it was – I had no interest in sharing personal information even though he did with me. If you find yourself not opening up to him because you don’t want to, your feelings are likely more lusty than loving.
You See Each Other More In Bed Than Out of It
Sex is important in a relationship, but so is spending more together out of bed – and with clothes on. When it seems like quality time consists of late night visits or lunch time quickies, the relationship may lean more toward sex and pizza than marriage and wedding cake.
There’s No Breakfast
Although the beginning stages of a relationship typically consist of parting ways right after sex or first thing in the morning, there is eventually an invite to either stay the night or do something non-sexual after waking up in the morning. When feelings start moving past the lust stage, there’s usually a point where you get breakfast after spending the night together – not only because you’re hungry but because you want just a little longer with that person before going home.
You Don’t See Him in Your Future
Talking to your guy about having a future together usually doesn’t happen in the early stages of the relationship, but that doesn’t mean you don’t at least consider the possibility. When you are in love with a guy, you see him as part of your future, whether it’s at your birthday next year or putting a wedding ring on your finger in the distant future. There may be a reason you can’t picture him by your side – it’s even worse if you know you don’t want him there.
He Hasn’t Met Your Family
Part of getting serious in a relationship involves going to important gatherings together and meeting each others family. If you’ve been together for awhile and you haven’t wanted him to meet your family or accompany you to any important family events even though there’s been opportunities for him to do so, it’s a sign that what you feel is more likely lust than love.
For some, it’s easy to differentiate between lust and love, but for many it’s more difficult. When it comes to feelings, it’s better to know where you stand than to prolong it. It can save a lot of heartache for the both of you, especially if one is leaning more toward love and the other just doesn’t feel the same way.