I’m not a husband. I am not a father. I’ve never made any woman a mother. I have a father. I have a mother. We get along really well. But that doesn’t qualify me as a candidate to stick “Baby on Board” decals on windows of my car. I do it anyway, and that makes me a Baby on Board imposter.
Baby on board. I see many vehicles with a yellow yield-sign with black lettering that reads Baby on Board. (see it and buy it here)
When I see a vehicle ahead of me with that yellow sign, I read it very carefully, two or three times, and make sure I don’t miss the point. There is, I say to myself, a baby, on board. Aboard that car, there is a baby. I try to picture the baby. I wonder, Is the baby a boy, or a girl? A lot of hair on that baby? What is the baby’s name? Sometimes, while I’m imagining, I almost smash into the back of the vehicle when it slows and stops at a red light.
But overall, that little yellow sign with the suction cup holding it to the window makes the vehicle carrying the baby much safer. We drivers around that Baby on Board vehicle begin to take the utmost caution in avoiding an accident with that vehicle. I would rather run over a pedestrian or crash into a bus full of high school students than hit that car carrying a baby.
Babies are fragile and far more important than any other human. Babies have so much potential. Most adults, we can clearly observe, are matured babies who actually never had potential (even if we thought they did).
It is for this reason I have six Baby on Board yield signs hanging in my car. I want all the drivers, on all sides of my vehicle, to take the utmost caution while driving around me. I have stuck a Baby on Board decal to the lower left of my windshield. I have placed a decal on each of my four side windows, and on the back window.
I am currently shopping around for a Baby on Board bumper stick as well. Never can take too much caution.
While the Baby on Board sticker might induce other drives to take caution around the vehicle transporting the baby, the sign also alerts medical professionals that a baby is, indeed, on board the vehicle. In the unfortunate case of an auto accident, the medical officials will know the baby might be hidden somewhere in the vehicle after a crash.
At least that’s the official story / function of these great little signs. In that sense, I would hate to get into an auto accident, and have the medical professionals desperately searching for six babies in my smashed car. If I’m unconscious, I won’t be able to tell them, “Not six babies. No babies.”
But I still like the extra safety a Baby on Board sign affords me.