It has been six months since you broke up. You have been through the traditional relationship mourning period and are ready to move on to someone new. Before you get carried away with a new partner though, you need to make absolutely sure you are completely over your ex. Just because you think you are ready to start a new relationship, it doesn’t mean you really are. Have a look at these five signs you’re not over your ex before you begin dating again.
Five Signs You’re Not Over Your Ex
1. You still have photos of the two of you on display
It may seem innocent to keep these photos in random places in your house, but is it really? If photos of you and your ex are still easy to spot, you may not be as over the relationship as you thought you were. Ask yourself why they are still on show. If the answer is laziness, take them down immediately. The chances are though, you may still have some hidden feelings lurking under the surface. If this is the case, you should think very carefully before dating someone new.
2. You talk about your ex at every opportunity
It is perfectly normal to dissect every aspect of a relationship when it first ends. There is always a lot to discuss and to try to understand. After a while though, the need to go over everything should ease. If this doesn’t happen and you still find ways to talk about your ex, you probably aren’t ready to move on yet. There is no set time limit on how long it takes to get over someone, it is different for everyone. If you still need to talk, there is no harm in doing so. Just be careful that you aren’t prolonging your unhappiness by refusing to let it go.
3. You compare everyone to your ex
This is one of the more glaringly obvious signs you’re not over your ex. Comparing potential new partners to your ex may not be something you are doing deliberately. However, if you catch yourself doing it you should stop dating and give yourself a stern talking to. Remember, there must have been a very good reason for your break up. If your ex was really so perfect, wouldn’t you still be with them? Try to focus on looking for someone different, not a carbon copy of your former partner. If you don’t, you may find yourself facing the same problems over again.
With sites like Facebook and Twitter being so prolific, it is quite easy to engage in cyberstalking. Sneaking glimpses at your ex’s Facebook profile to check for new relationships means you are probably not over them yet. Be extra concerned if you are asking your friends to stalk for you because your ex blocked you! It is so tempting to take advantage of social networking sites but they never make you feel better. Try to be strong and avoid them if you can.
5. You go to places your ex hangs out
There is no sense in completely withdrawing yourself from having a social life after a break up. In fact, quite the opposite. You also shouldn’t feel like there are places you can’t go just in case you bump into your ex. However, if you are purposely spending time hanging around in his favourite bar, or jogging past his house on a regular basis, it is a good sign you are not over you’re ex. Instead of trying to recapture what you had, see it as a chance to find new places to go where you can create new memories.
If any of these signs sound familiar to you, it’s time to re-evaluate your feelings. You will only truly be over your ex when you have stopped doing these things. Relationships take a long time to get over, but clinging on to the past will only make the journey even longer.