In true ‘Desperate Housewives’ form, the episode aired on December 5, 2010 will most definitely be the subject of some water cooler conversation for diehard ‘Desperate’ fans. As mid-season draws to a close, the writers are planning on leaving us with plenty of scrapes, bruises and plenty to speculate on during the holiday hiatus.
Lynette & Tom
We found out that Tom packs quite a punch, after Susan walked in on Lynette and Tom having a romantic interlude on the nursery floor. Tom overhears Susan talking to Lynette about interrupting their romantic tryst, and grins from ear to ear upon hearing his new nickname, “Tommy Tripod”. As opposed to keeping his manhood concealed, he confronts Lynette to ask her why she hasn’t ever bragged about his “talent”. After a few pointed one-liners and a quick dismissal, Tommy Tripod starts sulking.
Over the course of the episode Lynette practically has her arm twisted by Tom to say “something” about what a real man he is, and she takes that opportunity to make some very memorable remarks about Tom’s…well…member, causing him considerable embarrassment in front of friends and neighbors since the platform for the speech was an HOA meeting.
We find out that the reason Lynette has been so tight lipped about commending Tommy’s hidden talent over the years is that she feels like she doesn’t deserve him. After all, she has the “perfect” husband according to friends and neighbors and no one has told him that he has the perfect wife. After a few tears, Tom comes up with the just the right thing to our hardcore housewife, that makes it all better and puts Tom and Lynette back in good spirits. (In addition to putting Tom’s extra talent to use…again).
Gabby & Carlos
My what a tangled web Gabby begins to weave in this one. After a short conversation with Lee regarding a “hypothetical” question about having Carmen deported, Gabby does the unthinkable and calls INS. She hopes that once Carmen is out of the picture that she will have Grace all to herself. However, upon seeing Grace’s reaction to the possibility of losing her mother, Gabby reconsiders and pretends to be Carmen, throwing herself in the middle of the arrest. INS takes Gabby away and (after a short time in a cell) later releases her into Carlos’ custody. Since Gabby’s actions made fools out of a government agency, it is no longer safe for Carmen and Grace at the Solis household, so they decide to hit the road for Texas to reunite with family. Gabby and Grace have a tearful and heartfelt goodbye, leaving us with no idea what happens next.
Bree & Keith
Keith wants to propose to Bree, and attempts at setting the mood (many times over) only to have dear old dad (Richard) tag along and ruin every potential moment. Toward the end of the episode, Keith finally works up the nerve to put the ring in a shrimp cocktail in what appeared to be the couple’s first dinner alone, only to have his dad show up and Bree kindly invite him to join them. In true matchmaking form, Bree also invites long lost friend Tracy (recently divorced, who she bumped into at the bar) to share the table in hopes that she and Richard will hit it off. Unfortunately the only sparks that fly over the meeting are related to flaring tempers as Tracy’s brazen and callous attitude turns Richard off and Keith’s engagement appetizer is delivered in the midst of it all, spoiling the moment. After the proposal is ruined, Keith storms out. When Bree visits Keith’s apartment later (short one Keith) she speaks to his Richard, who all but pounces on her out of his obvious romantic interest. Ever the lady, Bree exists, and we area all left wondering what Richard’s next move will be.
Susan & Mike
All I can say about Susan in this episode is that she needs to learn how to knock. If walking in on Tom and Lynette getting their bedroom boogey on wasn’t enough of a testament to announcing yourself when entering, I don’t know what is. Yet, our kind hearted and somewhat ditzy Susan walks in on Renee sobbing in the middle of the afternoon on her couch. Susan assumes Renee’s outburst is as a result of getting another year older and takes her to dinner. At dinner, we discover the reason for Renee’s breakdown is a result of having an unrequited love, spanning over one weekend 20 years ago. Susan gives her normal perky advice, full of hope and optimism only to find out (as she takes a very drunk Renee home) that the object of Renee’s affection is Tom Scavo. Uh oh.
Other memorable moments that make us sit up and take notice:
So we figured out Paul Young’s heinous plot. He wants to open a half way house in one of the seven homes he purchased on the lane. Paul has been buying up Wisteria Lane real estate like it’s going out of style (and that is obviously part of his plan). During a homeowner’s meeting, Paul finds himself out voted on the opening of his new project-or has he? Paul makes open offers to three people on the lane who are struggling with money, in an attempt to get them to sell to him for “well over market value”. As all hell breaks loose over the prospect of the neighbors selling to Paul, neighbor turns on neighbor and friend turns on friend. As Paul aptly puts it, he doesn’t need all of them to sell, just one. As we fade to black, Paul exists the meeting in the midst of the chaos and smiles a very creepy and sinister grin. He certainly has mastered the concept of winning friends and influencing people, in his own disturbing and spine-chilling way he knows how.
So what does this mean for the residents of Wistera Lane? Well, the upcoming episode shows us that there will be a lot of protest and spirited debate over Paul’s plan, leading to people getting hurt. At the end of the day, if the season “shocker” is someone taking a bat to Paul’s cranium as a result, it won’t be a surprise. The only mystery left to solve at that point will be “who did it”, and that one I can’t answer just yet.