Self Esteem (Original Presentation)
Before we get started, I want to make some things clear between us:
I will probably consider this the first official Gathering of the Church of Understanding. This is not because I had ever intended to run a physical church in this frame, or because I at all expect you to participate in this Church. What I am about to present, is part of the founding ideas of this Church, and it will develop further from this moment forward. I have, with open Tolerance and deep Respect, invited Christian, Wiccan, Muslim and Buddhist to sit next to the Atheists and the Agnostics to express Our Value in all Beliefs Equally. You have my sincere appreciation for participating in this moment.
You must also Understand that I do not stand here presenting myself as anything more than a fallible human. I am not even perfect in my eyes, much less in any divine sense. I stand here Knowing I have a very different Understanding than most Individuals, and I have been lead to Share that. Through my interactions with Others, from Family, Friends, and even Strangers and Enemies, and their recommendations; as well as specific Observations, I have felt Impressed to do this. When I have resisted those things I have felt Called to do, the depths of my sorrow has become physical, but when I Follow with a glad Heart, I am Blessed Beyond recognition. I will take this Journey and submit to even more than Your Judgment.
Forget everything you ever learned about Self-Esteem, or at least tuck it to the back of your mind. If I have learned nothing else about people, it is that, though generalizations may be true, Specific Individuals have Requirements as Unique and Individual as the Being themSelves. All the information scientists have gathered are educated Guesses. They prove themselves wrong in the “hard sciences” like astronomy; the less empiric “soft sciences” of psychology are more likely to be incorrect at times. We can accept that there are certain generalizations to be true in most cases, but You and I are not most cases.
We are Here, right Now, and Willing to Positivity. If You are Listening to the ideas of anOther, You are changing this Moment. Understanding the Importance of This Moment, is crucial to Self-Esteem. It is only in This Moment, that We have any control, what little that may be.
The Past has been and cannot be Changed. It is over and can no longer Impact This Moment any further than You Allow it. At worst, You can Refuse to have interactions about it, Exiting the space to Others who Refuse to allow Your Ignorance of that specific Past, Choosing to use Your Moment for some separate venture. There are Moments of the Past, for Specific Individuals, or at specific times, for whom this is completely Appropriate. We Must Always Remember, We do not Understand All there is to Know, before We try to Judge anOther. Even in Our Most Regrettable Moments, We may not be able to Change, but We can make an Effort to use the Experience to Produce a Positive End, by shear Will Alone.
The Future is a glimmer at best, and cannot be Dictated. Even in the tightest of laboratories, there are often unexpected or simply uncontrollable variables, especially when the subject is Human. If We allow only one uncontrollable variable for each Human Interaction, We find few Moments of even Possible Control. Consider as well that, within ourSelves, We must Concede Historical Variables (We are each a Product of our Culture and Generation), as well as Influenced by Our Individual Experiences; no matter how much We want to Control Our every Thought, We are still Influenced, the number of Possible Variables to Your Intentions for the Future only escalate leaving the Probability to Your Desired Outcome, slim at best.
If there is nothing that can be done about Past Mistakes, and so many Influences that cannot be Controlled in spite of Attempt, where is the Purpose? It is Here; right Now.
In This Moment You are making a Choice: You Choose to Stay or Leave. Even if You have not gotten out of your seat, You may not have Heard a word. Whatever You have Heard, You will decipher not only in Meaning, but in Intent. Though I may control the words and their order, what happens to them inside You Head is only Known by You. I cannot tell You what to Think of my Message, I can only Convey it. Once You Receive it, it is up to You what You will do with it; how You will Process it. Your Choices in Your Actions, are very similar to the Choices in Your Head.
In Your Head, You have an Individual Thought Process based on Your Personal Experience. Everything that makes up Your Being Impacts Your Thought Process. Sometimes it takes place by Conforming to the Patterns of Your Culture, or by Purposefully Denying them; though Celebrating the Cultural Holidays of Your Christian background, You may have Intentionally Nurtured Atheist Beliefs based on Disappointment. These are Rational, but Individual Choices, affected by the Past. It is also Our Choice to Dictate the Impact of Our Past based on Conscientious Decision; coming from an abusive home does not mean the abused will become an abuser. It may be Important to Understand Why Variables Impact our Decisions, but it is Imperative to Know that Understand Why does not excuse poor Choices.
This is true not only of the way We allow the Past to Impact This Moment, but in the Direction of Our Perspective. When We Look at a Moment, We Choose What We will See and How We will See it. When You Look at a cloudy sky, do You See the rain that may make for muddy floors, or do You See amazing shades of grey You have the Privilege of Experiencing, because You Know This Moment will never again come together in exactly this way? It doesn’t make the floors less muddy, but Choosing Your Perspective will Change the Emotion with which You deal with them.
You have the Ability to make these same kinds of Choices in Your Self View. You can Choose to wallow in the things You Perceive as Negative, or You can Choose to Enhance what is Pleasing. You can Choose to take Pride in Accomplishing the Changes You feel You need to make, or You can Choose to Lament the Need for Change. It is that simple. Form Your Thoughts around the kind of Being You want to be.
Keep in mind, the Past was less than a minute ago, the Future is stored in Your next breath. It’s Good to Understand where You came from, as it is Good to have Direction for Your Future, but all You Must do, is make the Right Choice in This Moment. There are too many outside Variables to worry about Obstacles in any other Moment. Breath Deep, Know that You have made the Right Choice for this Moment, and keep Progressing.