Raising children is a full time job that does not end when the child reaches adulthood. Infants require constant care, toddlers require constant supervision, teens think they know it all and the adult child living at home now realizes he knows nothing. Being the father of 5 children and from a family of 12, I have been exposed to my share of different parenting techniques – some traditional and some not. Below are 10 types of passive and aggressive parenting techniques.
1. Time – Out. This old faithful of discipline is great for the toddler or young child but ineffective for the 11 and older child. Sitting out for 10 minutes can seem like 1 hour to an 8 year old.
2. Take-it -away. Punishing a child by taking away something is effective but why bother if you will return the item.
3. Throw -it- away. My mom used to threaten to throw away everything on the floor if it wasn’t picked up. I don’t recall her ever doing it. I now threaten my own kids with the same action when I want their rooms cleaned but can’t get past the idea of throwing away things I bought with hard earned money.
4. Insult your children. This is done to express extreme disappointment in something the child did. Such statements as, “you’re not my child”, “you’re an error of the pill”, or “you worthless SOB”, are effective in inflicting immediate emotional pain. You can take this back after your child’s next praiseworthy milestone.
5. Bully or tease your kids back. If you find out your kids are bullying someone give them a taste of their own medicine. Tease them about their hair, weight, height, acne or any attribute that could hurt their self-esteem.
6. Threat siblings different. Parents usually give teen boys more freedoms than teen girls. Buy one child second hand clothes or give them hand-me downs, while you buy new clothes for your favorite.
7. Spank but not forceful. Slow the momentum of the spank before it reaches the behind. The whooping becomes a warning instead.
8. Give a stern command with a stone face. This is my favorite technique because my kids know I mean business. If this does not get their attention the next two will.
9. Scream. A high pitched NOW, QUIET, or STFU!! Will get immediate attention.
10. Throw a Tantrum. If the scream does not work then act like my 8 year-old bipolar foster son and throw things, break dishes, hit walls and slam doors. This technique brings back bad memories of my dad so I will end here.